I know that Jackie’s friends know what a wonderful person she was, and I’m assuming those in support of me (my friends) feel the same toward me, but I wanted to share this with you all so that you know that you were not only supporting a great person but also an awesome relationship.

I was in the seventh grade and Jackie in the fifth. I knew her because she was cute and mature for her age. (By mature I mean she wore a training bra)  One recess a friend of hers named Claire approached me and said “Jackie Mountford wants to go around with you”, so I said “sure”. Of course Jackie and I never spoke that recess and later that day at lunch, Claire came over and said “Jackie doesn’t want to go around with you anymore, she likes Mike Davidson” (another grade seven boy) so I said, “Ok”, and that was our first “relationship”

            Fast forward 3 years. We went to a junior high school so the grades went from 8-10. Being a “big” tenth grader and somewhat popular, I thought I was something special; after all, I had the coolest mullet around. One day a grade eight girl approached me in the hallway and said, “Jackie Mountford likes you” then walked away. I immediately found her (Jackie) with a group of girls and arrogantly stated “so I hear you like me” and she replied “No” and walked away. I stood there feeling ridiculous as 8^th graders laughed at my expense. Later that evening I received a phone call at home from none other than…Jackie! She asked me why I tried to embarrass her in front of her friends and basically put me in my place. We started chatting on the phone and at school (this was well before email and instant messaging) I’ll admit I was attracted to her and being the romantic guy that I was I told her I was going to ask out Julie (a 9^th grader) and if she said no to me AND when Jackie got her braces off then we could go out.

Romantic huh ;)

            It turned out that Julie didn’t like me and as soon a Jackie’s braces were removed (a few weeks later) so we officially started “going out”. A typical high school relationship; fight – break up – get back together, this went on for 3 years or so. Eventually she got sick of my crap and dumped me for good. I was heartbroken. I tried so hard to get her back, I wrote poems, sung love songs (on a mixed tape…lol) left flowers at her door etc. After a year or so of this I finally gave up…or did I?

 She ended up in a relationship that lasted a few years and I started seeing other girls as well but we always kept in touch with a phone call every now and then. I remember when she graduated high school she came by my parent’s house to show off the new car that her Nana had bought her. In the back of my mind I thought that if her and Mike ever broke up that I may still have a chance. They eventually did.

            A couple of years went by and we hadn’t talked much, this was 1991. I was at a local night club (Cheers) dancing with some girl and a friend of mine came up and whispered two words in my ear that instantly stopped my moon walking robot, and I just left that poor girl alone on the dance floor to see for myself. The two words he said…”Jackie’s here”

            I approached her and we talked and danced and had some drinks. I had quite a few that evening but in the morning I could vaguely remember us making out! I wasn’t sure if I had dreamt this or not so I called her that day and asked her flat out. She replied “yes but I don’t want to talk about it” I had a smile on my face the rest of the day. Not long after we ended up back together.          

            At the time Jackie’s sister (Danielle) was seeing a guy (Jamie) and they were in loooove! Actually, they seemed like the perfect couple at the time and had been together quite awhile. I remember Jackie’s mom going to see a clairvoyant (fortune teller) and her session was taped. We all listened to it and some of the things said were eerily accurate. She (the clairvoyant) made a comment something like “I see that your daughter is with her soul mate” and everyone went on and on about how lucky her and Jamie were. Including me! Jack and I had just got back together so it never really crossed my mind. A few weeks later somehow this conversation came back up and Jackie looked at me and said “Why does everybody assume that she was talking about Danielle” I remember that statement like it was yesterday. They broke up a couple of years later and we were married in 1997. If you count all the time that we have been a part of each others lives it ads up to 27 years, and although this is more than half of my life, is no where near enough time with her. When people use the expression “living the dream” I literally was. It was always my dream since I was 15 to marry Jackie and raise a family together. To see her in her fight made me feel helpless at times. It constantly felt like I had a two hundred pound weight on my chest that made my heart ache and made it hard to take a deep breath. I know that without our two wonderful boys (Treydon 7 and Matteus 3) that she would not have had the strength to fight as long as she did.

            Those who know me are probably shocked that I am pouring my heart out. For whatever reasons I barely show my emotional side and prior to all this I think the last time I cried was when Joanie and Chachi broke up. I know everyone not from my generation is out there are scratching their heads saying Joanie and who? (Just Google it) But the past two years I found myself (usually when I was alone in the car) “emotional”. Remember that mixed tape that I mentioned with me signing love songs on…years later when we were already married she pulled it out of a box and played it, I was totally embarrassed. Jackie was the most loving and understanding mother and wife and I know that every accomplishment that I have achieved was directly related to her support and encouragement. I just wanted to share some of our history so you know that your kind donations, prayers and positive thoughts were not only helping my beautiful wife during her struggle, but it also gave me the strength to provide her with the support that she needed.

 I cannot express the words to say how much I’ve appreciated everything that you have done for us. Jack was the love of my life, the mother of my children and my very best friend in the world. My soul will forever ache without its mate.

Darren

thank you for starting this thread and also posting Darren’s poignant remembrance.

My relationship with Jackie was not profound, unfortunately. Just a few PMs but in re-reading them I was struck by her strength and her concern for others. 

Darren, your words touched my heart. I grieve for you and your children. Thank you for writing. I now have a much better sense of your beloved Jackie. May she rest in peace.

I believe, that some day, we will look back at these dark days as past history. Young women will no longer lose their battles with this monster. Until then, we need to keep supporting/helping each other as best we can. That is why I feel our TNBC Foundation family is such a wonderful resource.

with my love,

Steve