Hello Friends,

I usually spend time posting answers and questions in this forum and Yahoo Answers (cancer category).  I made a friend there and have known her since my wife's diagnosis of TNBC .  She was one of the very first people to offer me hope and helped me with good advice.

She had not been on for over a year, she had gone through surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation all of last year.  I just found out through a post that she did that her cancer is back.  Now it is in her lungs and lymph nodes.  She is pretty depressed and she feels like she will die soon.

The doctors have her on a new chemotherapy regimen that has a 10-25% chance of working.  I offered her prayers but I feel that is not enough.  Is there anything you say to somebody that thinks they are going to die because of cancer?

How can I support her, how would you support her if she was a member here and had TNBC?  She seems to have lost all hope, and it saddens me.

Thank you for any response,

Dave

 

This is a difficult question not only because it is so personal but because of the lapse in contact over the past year.  Since she has recently posted that tells me she is reaching out so if you have her personal email address you might want to touch base with her first to get a feel for where she is at and if she even wants to chat with anyone.  This is such a personal situation that if we are not in close contact all the time, words are never enough.  Prayer is the only thing that I know that works because it sends healthy messages to the ones we pray for and Our Lord and Saviour hears the cries of those who suffer and if you are praying for her then your prayers are certainly heard. 

 

Try the email to see where she is in her journey and then ask what you can do for her, if anything that she needs that you could provide for her, etc. 

 

When I thought I would not make it, I just wanted to spend time with my son and his family who live in TN! I have done whatever I could for all that I know and I was ok with the rest.  My confession to my priest was made, my will was executed two months prior to diagnosis, my last wishes were done many years ago, my regrets have been worked through so I have none,  and the rest doesn't matter. Everyone deals with this time in our life not matter if it is from cancer or something else.  We need to be prepared we never know when our time is up.  

 

Hope that helps, Helen in NS

Your ideas and suggestions made my day!  I now know what to do, blessing to you and your family,

Sincerely,

Dave

 

Susan

I will try and convey to her that she has my support as much as I can offer.  

Dave

You might point out that mets don't necessarily mean a death sentence. I can think of one person here on this site and know there are others that have survived mets again and again. The person I'm thinking about is Caryn. I have read her journey from the beginning here on this site. It is nothing but awe inspiring. Again, I know there are others.

I know, just like everyone knows who have gone this route that her fears are very real to her. But there is hope. I agree with Helen's post. When all is said and done Jesus is our everlasting comfort.

Love and Prayers,

Carol