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    Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 10:45am
To my beloved TNBC Foundation family,

I am writing with a very heavy heart that Eileen F., my dear friend, and a friend to so many here, passed this morning. I first interacted with Eileen in February and what started out as a message and then a phone call developed into a beautiful friendship because Eileen was truly an exceptionally wonderful, bright, courageous woman who throughout her battle continued to reach out to others in an effort to help them.

I do not have the family’s permission to post any details about her life so I will not. I will update things further, only if I have their blessings including the funeral home details. I was just told services will probably be this Thursday in Bronxville, NY.

Eileen had Inflammatory Breast Cancer that was also TNBC and she was quite public about the fact that she was battling this type of rare cancer, again in an effort to help others. I had the privilege to meet her many times and accompany her to her oncologists. It is very hard for me to describe her positive attitude properly. This was really one of those cases where to know and understand Eileen was to love her...and I did.

I would like to include a thread on Inflammatory Breast Cancer, in this tribute, because I believe Eileen would want it here. It has nothing to do with some kind words about me, rather it is about rare stories of IBC with TNBC that have occurred and may occur again in the future and hopefully this thread will help someone/s as IBC is often mis-diagnosed. Eileen would have liked that, I am certain. Despite her arduous journey she was determined to help others in our wonderful TNBC Foundation family and also those who did not have TNBC. She did this by words and actions. She posted actively on the board when she could and spoke to many who had IBC. She introduced me to several IBC friends and it was clear that they all admired Eileen.


Eileen and I devoted much time doing research on IBC and TNBC and various trials. We spoke and corresponded to each other, often, and she crept into my heart in a very profound way and she will remain there for eternity. 

She was loved by her oncologists, nurses and physician assistants. Everyone who came in contact with her was graced by her presence and came away a richer person for knowing her. Her positive attitude was simply indescribable.

Along this journey I met T., Eileen’s husband whose support never wavered. There at every meeting and always present with his love and concern. My heart is with you and your daughters today. T., you defined the word devotion. 

Eileen, thank you for coming into my life. You shall always be in my heart and you shall continue to encourage me to be a patient advocate. Thank you for being you and for being the inspiration you are to all of us.

May you rest in peace, dear friend. 

with my love,

Steve 

p.s. Eileen, I was delighted that the pictures of my new grandson brought you such happiness in the midst of the battle. I am only sorry you didn’t meet him in person but in thinking about it, I sensed you ‘knew’ him, somehow. I am about to tell my wife about your passing and I am so happy you got a chance to meet each other. You made quite an impression on her as you did to everyone you touched.

p.p.s. I have updated this thread with a new post that contains two eulogies read by Eileen’s daughter at the funeral. As I wrote her daughter, just now, I think you will find the words poignantly beautiful and at the same time words for all of us to try to live by.

 




Edited by steve - Nov 09 2011 at 5:28pm
I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 123Donna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 11:25am
Oh Steve, my heart is so heavy and saddened to hear of Eileen's passing.  She was a beautiful lady who supported us all.  Even through all her adversity, she always reached out to us to offer support and compassion.  Eileen, we love you dear friend.

Donna
DX IDC TNBC 6/09 age 49, Stage 1,Grade 3, 1.5cm,0/5Nodes,KI-67 48%,BRCA-,6/09bi-mx, recon, T/C X4(9/09)
11/10 Recur IM node, Gem,Carb,Iniparib 12/10,MRI NED 2/11,IMRT Radsx40,CT NED11/13,MRI NED3/15

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Pink Warrior Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 12:43pm
Cry  So sorry to hear this.

Rest in eternal peace, Eileen.  
Dx:10/09,IDC Stg 2,Gr 3,TN
BRCA 1&2 -
Partial DD EC/AC
Local recur 11/10
BMX 12/10 Right proph
TC x 4 Rads x 33
9/11 Skin mets, mediastinal & hilar nodes
Abraxane/Avastin
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote tninalabama Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 2:16pm
My condolences for Eileen's family and friends.
Dx 11/07,stII bgr3,1/8+, metaplastic, recurrence 11/09, lymph dis 12/13+ 07/10, rad,x28 9/10,02/11 mets

BRCA neg
5-FMC since 03/12
PET 04/12,no progression
Bone scan clear 06/12
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote janet c. Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 3:18pm
I am so sad to hear this. Her kindness came through with her support of others. I will pray for her family.
Janet
dx 12/08 @47yrs.old TNBC stage 2a grade 3, 2.1cm. partial mastectomy sentinal node negative BRACA negative Cytocan/Taxatere x4 radiation 36 or 38rounds
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Barbi Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 3:58pm
Thanks Eileen for your contributions here. Be at peace. Prayers for your family.
10/10,age49,St3,gr3,5+cm,1 node,BRCA-,T+Cisplatin+Rad0001(or placebo),Lump 1+cm,AND 0/15,AC,rads finished 7/6/11.Mets bone, liver,mamm node 8/11,abrax/tigatuzamab failed.Started bicalutamide 11/16/11.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Annie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 4:41pm
With Love and Sympathy...Annie
Annie TNBC Stage IIA Gr 3 1cm lesion 2/5 lymph nodes+ lumpectomy,FEC & D 30Rads finished(08/2009) BRCA- Chronic Cellulitis due to Radiation-- L.Mastectomy Jan 2012
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sue Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 5:09pm
Dear Steve, 

So sorry to hear about Eileen's passing, may she rest in peace. She was always such a supportive member of our family here. Prayers for her family and friends that time will ease the difficulty of their loss. 

Love and Peace, 
Sue
Dx 7/10, age 53. TNBC left breast, stage I, grade 3, IDC 0.5 cm, DCI 2.5 cm, 0/8 lymph nodes neg. BRCA-. T/C x4 finished 2/09/11, rads x34 finished 4/21/11.          
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote dmwolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 6:22pm
Poor Eileen, this makes me weep.    I hate the way this disease lays waste to so much of our community.  The wake of sorrow and destruction is enormous.    I will fold her name in my heart and add her memory to the fuel that powers my daily exertions.
DX 2/08@43 stg II IDC; gr2,0 nodes. Neoadj chemo, first ACx2 (fail) then CarboTaxotereX6(better). Lump, Rads done 11/08; Clodronate. False alarm queen: PetCT lung & TM marker. NED. PBM w/recon 9/10.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SagePatientAdvocates Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 6:48pm
Dear Denise,

Your eloquence, today, was so very, very beautiful and is helping me through this miserable day and hopefully the years to come.

I will fold her name in my heart and add her memory to the fuel that powers my daily exertions.

How lovely, dear Denise. Thank you. I will hold your words close to my heart.

The other thing that helped me through, today, was thinking of Eileen’s humor, even during crummy times. At our first meeting we arranged to meet the night before her consultation in Philadelphia, near Fox-Chase. I chose a 50’s style diner that I thought she, her DH and I would enjoy. I described myself as "6’3”, overweight, full white beard, poor posture, good heart with a space between my two front teeth." She laughed and said “I’ll be the one on oxygen” and at that we both cracked up as she finished with “I have a feeling we will find each other” and we did. Something, often, changes when you meet someone in person and that was the case here.

Our friendship deepened and our trust in each other deepened. 

Like when I met you...

Nice to have you in my life...especially on a day like this...

love,

Steve


I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SagePatientAdvocates Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 31 2011 at 10:28pm
Dear all,

I have decided to go to Eileen’s wake/funeral. If anyone knew Eileen and has not heard from the family and would like to go please send me a PM.

I will try to look at my messages in the a.m. before I go to the airport and respond with my phone number.

I leave Los Angeles at 10:25 a.m. get into Newark tomorrow evening ay 6:45 and there is no internet on the plane and I am not sure of my plans precisely but I will stay in touch and advise...so please send me a message if you are interested in going.

thank you,

Steve
I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 123Donna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 6:39am
Steve,

Please let Eileen's family know how much she meant to us.

Hugs,

Donna
DX IDC TNBC 6/09 age 49, Stage 1,Grade 3, 1.5cm,0/5Nodes,KI-67 48%,BRCA-,6/09bi-mx, recon, T/C X4(9/09)
11/10 Recur IM node, Gem,Carb,Iniparib 12/10,MRI NED 2/11,IMRT Radsx40,CT NED11/13,MRI NED3/15

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SagePatientAdvocates Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 7:38am
Donna, thank you for that thought. I think I will wait to see the additional tributes that may come in for Eileen through tomorrow morning and then print this thread out and seal it and give the envelope to Eileen’s husband to be read at a future date. 

I believe, in some small way, this may do some good. I think it will be very special for her family to see how she is loved by this wonderful TNBC Foundation family.

hugs back at you,

Steve
I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Genie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 9:01am
My deepest sympathy for Eileen's family & friends. May God wrap His loving arms around them all and comfort them.

Genie
DX 3/10/08 at age 67, IDC. Stage 1, Grade 3, 1.5 cm.
KI-67 99% at MX . Bilateral mastectomy 4/1/08 Node-, BRCA 1/2-,BARD1+, TX:Cytoxan/Taxotere x4,3 in family with TNBC
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nmunoz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 9:04am
Thanks for sharing your courage and wisdom with us Eileen.
We will miss you...


Natalia, 38 years

Dx TNBC 10/22/08, BRCA1+

Double Mx 11/20/08 with Recon.

3/37 nodes

Rads 7 weeks done 8/09

ACx4 every 2 weeks and Tx12 weeks. Avastin e/3 weeksx10 (Clinical Trial) Done Dec/09
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TNBC_in_NS Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 12:50pm
Our Eileen is gone, I am speechless!
 
May God Bless & Keep Eileen, her family & friends in the palm of His hand always. love h.
 
Diag@57TNBC04/092.5cm Lquad 05/09 TCx4Radsx30CT03/01/10 FU03/31/10ClearBRCA- 01/2011 RTNBC BMX 06/14/2011~2013 clear
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lillie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 1:59pm
I am so sorry Eileen lost the Cancer Battle, but she will go on. Her soul is with Jesus Christ in Heaven.

My condolances to all her family.

Not everyone could fight the battle and be an advocate for everyone else at the same time, but Eileen did it. Eileen was a Special Lady.

Steve, I am glad you are planning to attend the service. Sometimes you just gotta' do what you know is right. I think this is one of those times for you.

God Bless,
Lillie
Dx 6/06 age 65,IDC-TNBC
Stage IIb,Gr3,2cm,BRCA-
6/06 L/Mast/w/SNB,1of3 Nodes+
6/06 Axl. 9 nodes-
8/8 thru 11/15 Chemo (Clin-Trial) DD A/Cx4 -- DD taxol+gemzar x4
No Rads.
No RECON - 11/2018-12 yrs NED
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LauraT Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 3:49pm
Our loss is Heaven's gain. We will miss you, Eileen, and your wonderful spirit. Thank you for giving of yourself so unselfishly to others even while you were waging your own war against this wretched disease. You are what is right with this world and we are thankful to have known and loved you. Your family will be in our prayers for comfort. strength and peace.

Love,
Laura
DX 10/09 @44, Stage I IDC tnbc, DCIS other side, Neoadjuvant TCx4, Bilateral Mastectomy w/Recon 1/10, 1.2cm 0/7 Nodes, 5/11 Mets to Lungs/Lymph Nodes, Avastin/Taxol, 10/11 Bone Mets, Xgeva
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Charlene Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 4:10pm
I am very sad about the loss of Eileen.  Her posts were full of courage and hope and gave others strength.  I will pray for peace and healing for her family.
Charlene
DX 3/10 @59 ILC/TNBC
Stage 1, Grade 2, Multifocal; Lumpectomy/re-excision
SNB 0/4 nodes, BRCA-; Taxotere/Cytoxan X4, 30 rads
3/14:NED
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Susie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Nov 01 2011 at 7:51pm
Peace to Eileen's family that passes understanding.....
 
Susie
 


Edited by Susie - Nov 01 2011 at 7:52pm
dx 10/08,age 56,.75 cm. Stage1 Grade3,lumpectomy,SN neg..,AC 12/08-02/09,35rads,03/09-05/09,BRCA2+(E1415X),06/09,oophorectomy 10/09,
Zometa - IV/mo.,07/09-08/10, lumpectomy #2 10/20/10 NED
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