New to the Forum-Recurrent

After having my 15-year cancerversary, I did not expect to be back here.

I was 15 years from my first TNBC diagnosis. I had lumpectomy with TAC and radiation. 15 years cancer free! 5 months ago, I had a clean mammo and in September this 5.9 cm burning mass showed up. I had a bilateral mastectomy with sentinel/axillary node dissection. I have 1mm in one node. I don't know why but that one mm scared me. The sentinel nodes were clumped together and didn't pick up dye. I was told they were probably damaged from extensive radiation treatment my first cancer. It made the skin where my sentinels are flake off, so I wouldn't be surprised if they were fried.

The speed with which the new tumor grew was alarming. My old HMO-run clinic just did not offer the comprehensive care I needed, so I must wait 7 weeks to get into my new (much better) clinic. I am trying to stay calm and enjoy this 7 week break but also concerned that if I wait too long something else will show up.

Six weeks of constant and incessant news, pathology reports and multiple interpretations of the same path report, lab results, etc. has made me crazy! Without the support I need to process it all, it has left me emotionally frazzled and in a chronic state of distraction. All I think about is cancer. My faith has helped a lot and so has my church. I'd be a lot worse without it. But I definitely feel as if I need more to help me refocus and shift back into a place where cancer is a part of my day and I can get on with life and living-not simply sitting and waiting for the next big test result or news.

Anyone else identify or been there? Hello! Does anyone have experience switching docs/teams in the middle of treatment?