PLAIN SICK OF IT ALL!

I am just so sick and tired of this doctor says this thing, and this other doctor disagrees! Why dont they all get their acts together and work together on this subtype of cancer called TNBC!? Lets face it, they just dont know! They are confused, they are doing the best they can for us. Each patient is different, is going to respond differently. Which makes it VERY difficult for us to make any kind of guess as to what treatments to CHOOSE from.
And guessing is just what we are doing, based on what our drs tell us.
Im just glad that my guesswork seems to be working for me.
May all your guesses be good for you.
Im just sick and tired of reading about it anymore. I want to go out in the sun, I want to be able to walk up the stairs instead of crawl up them! I don't want to have this EFFING TNBC!!

We feel bad because cancer is scary, and TNBC is scary compared to other BCs, but think how lucky we are that we don't have something nearly invariably fatal, like pancreatic cancer or some brain cancers.   We also are lucky to have love in our lives, family, and not live in abject poverty like so many of the worlds millions.   We have been blessed with opportunity, and are largely self realized.  Yes, we want more.  More health, more time, more life.  But we are lucky.  It helps me to remember this.  Not everyone gets the full meal of life.  I have already had more than most.

d

On the other hand, the professionals over at the FDA just declared Cheerios cereal a drug, because of their ads that it lowers cholesterol, and are therefore asking that it go through FDA approval as a drug. Just a thought, but hey FDA, there's a whole world of real probems out there that are killing people, do your job please.

Yesterday I sat on a bench and put my tingling, burning,aching neuropathic feet up and put face up to the sun....

so glad to hear someone else say it.   I HATE THIS FXXXX  DISEASE!  i don't want it to be all mind consuming.  the first thing i think of when i wake up, go to bed, eat, travel, visit, walk, talk,work.  i can't seem to turn it off.  my husband says he doesn't see me in a fighting mode with this thing.  it has taken over me.   how do you get that positive attitude back.  i was such a positive person before, now i cry at the drop of a hat.  i feel removed.  i have a strong belief that  God will take care of me when i die, but i want that fighting mode to kick in til then.  then i watch farrah fawcett's story, different cancer but still cancer. and then desperate housewives charecters cancer returns, and oh shix!  i don't want to fake being positive like i do when i am with friends and family,     i want to BE positive. i want to know i am going to be OK!and that my boob will be there again tomorrow, that my port will be gone, that my hair will be long and shiney again, my stomach won't feel raw, that my head won't hurt, that i won't wake up in a cold sweat in the night that i can look , can i say it, sexy again for my husband.   i feel like a freak.  i feel guilty even writing these things because i know it could be SSSSSSOOOOOOOOO much worse.  i know it , i know it , i know it.  but it goes through my mind. my husband has worked so hard and is at the age he should be enjoying its benefits and now he has to pay for taking care of me and putting his wants on hold.  he isn't complaining, i am.      i need to hear from someone that is 25 years out with this disease and doing great.                  there, i had my pity party this morning, i wrote it down for all to see and it looks awful doesn't it? i know it, i know it, i know it.  but on those down days, that's what it is.           bon

catherine,  thank-you for your support.   it is so nice to kick and scream and have someone say it's ok to do so.  what would i do if i hadn't found this forum.......................     bon

It's easy to be an angel when no one ruffles your feathers!