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Shiva Haghighi 1985-2014

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SagePatientAdvocates View Drop Down
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    Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 1:01am
Dear TNBC family,

This brilliant young woman and her extraordinary Mother graced my life with their presence for the last several years. I received permission, from Mom, to post the news of her beloved daughter's passing. 

I just wanted to tell that we had Shiva's memorial service last Sunday. It was a very beautiful remembrance of Shiva with all speakers being among her many young and loving friends.

Here is a link to her obituary:

And this is a link to a scholarship fund that was established (by one of her friends) in her name. I thought you would be happy to know that this was created.

......................

Atossa, your love, devotion and intelligent advocacy to Shiva was one of the most profound things I have ever witnessed. I so admire you and you have my deep, deep condolences. 

I have no brilliant words...just an ache in my heart...

love to all,

Steve


I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote 123Donna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 8:05am
Thank you for sharing with us Steve.  Shiva accomplished so much in her short time on earth.  A beautiful woman, gone too soon.  

Donna
DX IDC TNBC 6/09 age 49, Stage 1,Grade 3, 1.5cm,0/5Nodes,KI-67 48%,BRCA-,6/09bi-mx, recon, T/C X4(9/09)
11/10 Recur IM node, Gem,Carb,Iniparib 12/10,MRI NED 2/11,IMRT Radsx40,CT NED11/13,MRI NED3/15

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lillie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 8:57am
Thank you Steve for sharing Shivia with us. My condolences to her family and fiancé.

What a lovely lady, what a tender young age. So sorry.

Love and God Bless,
Lillie
Dx 6/06 age 65,IDC-TNBC
Stage IIb,Gr3,2cm,BRCA-
6/06 L/Mast/w/SNB,1of3 Nodes+
6/06 Axl. 9 nodes-
8/8 thru 11/15 Chemo (Clin-Trial) DD A/Cx4 -- DD taxol+gemzar x4
No Rads.
No RECON - 11/2015-9 yrs NED
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BanR Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 2:48pm
One more beautiful person gone too soon because of this disease. 
TNBC- we need a cure soon desperately!!
My heartfelt condolences to her family. Feel so sad!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TriplePositiveGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 7:28pm
This is very sad. She is far too young! My condolences to her family and friends. This disease has no mercy.

Best,
Lisa
Diagnosed Jan 2010; Stage IIa, grade 2, 3.2cm in rt. breast, no nodes and BRCA-. 4 cycles Carbo/Gemzar 3/10; Lump 6/10; 2 cycles carbo/gem after surgery 8/10; 35 Rads finished 12/1/10. NED.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Natalie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 16 2014 at 10:19pm
This is a HORID MONSTER WITH NO COMPASSION. I ache seeing another person gone to this. Just a baby,and not in the rehlm of the natural order of things or what they are suppose to be. My deepest sympathy to all that love her.
Natalie
TNBC stage1 size 1.8, grade3 no nodes 4/11 Lumpectomy 5/11 4cycles DD A/C 4cycles DD Taxol. Double Mastectomy 12/11 BRCA all neg
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SagePatientAdvocates Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 2:03am
Dear Atossa,

My grandfather was a young dad (19) and when my Mom died at 46 from Metastatic Breast Cancer (most likely TNBC) he was 65 and he told me (I was 20)-

"I know how much you loved your Mother but the worst pain known to man is to lose a child." 

I believe that to be a true statement.

My grandfather was never the same and he could not utter my Mother's name without losing it. I guess, in a way, I have been changed forever, as well. The grief is still there on some level...deeply buried, sublimated, whatever, but it is still there as I cry as I type. Such a marvelous woman..never to see her six grandchildren and three great-grandchildren or to meet my adored wife. They would have been such great, great friends.

I was a young dad (24) too and when my daughter was diagnosed, with TNBC, at the age of 36 I was 60 and I thought I would lose her and I just about lost my mind and I thought of my grandfather's words and how right he was. Fortunately, my daughter in August, will be ten years 'out' and hopefully, NED. 

I have been truly aching since you wrote me, Atossa. And, sorry, I still have no brilliant words other than that you are a lovely woman and the world needs your compassion and intelligence.  

Atossa may your find some peace in your grieving and know that I shall always carry you and Shiva in my heart. You said you would stay in touch. Please, please do so.

Rest in peace, dear Shiva.

with my love,

Steve

p.s. Natalie and others, you are right, there is no justice here; the natural order of things is shattered; there is just an "it is what it is" here and miraculously we have our TNBC Foundation family...where the feelings, support, willingness to share knowledge, experiences and love are all intertwined. 




Edited by steve - Apr 17 2014 at 7:50am
I am a BRCA1+ grandson, son and father of women affected by breast/oc-my daughter inherited mutation from me, and at 36, was dx 2004 TNBC I am a volunteer patient advocate with SAGE Patient Advocates
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Melissa P. Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 17 2014 at 11:19pm
Thank you Steve for sharing Shiva with us, sorry... Another young, beautiful lady that had a life ahead of her gone way too soon. Such sadness.
Melissa
"Hope for more Tomorrows"
TNBC dx August 2009, Age 41, Stage 2, 2cm, 0 nodes Lumpectomy/ACx4,Taxolx4/33rads
Triple Negative Breast Cancer, "I Won't Back Down!"
mlsspaskvan.blogspot.com
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Melissa P. Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Apr 26 2014 at 6:09pm

Steve, I hope you don't mind that I posted the beautiful pic of Shiva, wanted everyone here see how beautiful she was. Melissa


Shiva Haghighi


Shiva Haghighi

Shiva Haghighi, a beloved daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, cousin, and friend, died Saturday March 22, 2014 at the age of 28.

She was born in Englewood, New Jersey in 1985 and raised in West Lafayette, Indiana since 1986. Shiva's natural charisma, intellect and magnetic personality were evident as a young child and helped fuel many accomplishments during her short but impactful life. She earned a BS in Civil Engineering in 2008 followed by a MS in Civil Engineering with an emphasis in Architectural Engineering in 2011, both from the prestigious Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. Shiva was also the president of Purdue's Civil Engineering Student Advisory Council and was selected as one of 12 delegates to participate in the highly competitive Transatlantic Program for Young Technology Leaders. She went on to become a project engineer and consultant at Ebert & Baumann Consulting in Washington DC, in 2011.While professionally and academically accomplished, Shiva's legacy will be defined by the lasting influence she had on her family, friends and colleagues.

Influenced by her beloved late father, Kamyar Haghighi, she developed a passionate love for soccer, a sophisticated and rich taste for music, and a compassion for social justice and human rights. She loved liberally and in return, was loved by all. Her infectious laugh and zeal for life was unparalleled and will continue to inspire others.

Shiva is survived by her mother, Atossa Rahmanifar, and her sister, Nina Haghighi (fiancé Tim Wright). Other survivors are her grandmother, Behjat Zand, aunt Taraneh Rahmanifar, cousin Nicola Shahin Haghighi, and many other relatives all over the world.

A service will be held at the Thomas Duncan Hall (619 Ferry St., Lafayette, IN 47901) on Sunday, April 13, at 1 pm. In Lieu of flowers, donations can be made to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation, online at www.bcrfcure.org (as a Tribute Donation) or by check payable to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation, 60 E. 56th St, 8th floor, New York, NY 10022, with a note on the memo line "In memory of Shiva Haghighi." A memorial fund has been established at Purdue University in Shiva's name. Donations can be made at https://shivahaghighi.crowdtilt.com or by check payable to Purdue University Foundation, c/o Amy Noah, Purdue University Dauch Alumni Center, 403 West Wood Street, West Lafayette, IN 47907, with a note on the memo line ""In memory of Shiva Haghighi."


Published in the Journal & Courier on Mar. 26, 2014
- See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/jconline/obituary.aspx?pid=170364384#sthash.Ffn8XJSk.dpuf




Edited by Melissa P. - Apr 26 2014 at 6:14pm
"Hope for more Tomorrows"
TNBC dx August 2009, Age 41, Stage 2, 2cm, 0 nodes Lumpectomy/ACx4,Taxolx4/33rads
Triple Negative Breast Cancer, "I Won't Back Down!"
mlsspaskvan.blogspot.com
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