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Hair Loss

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GrammaSue View Drop Down
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Joined: Feb 04 2017
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    Posted: Feb 13 2017 at 8:00pm
Throughout the time since my diagnosis I've been maintaining a sense of calm over the loss of my hair. I rationalized that as a 70 year old woman, who would care about whether I lost my hair or not. I imagined myself not caring so much and just dealing with it. Perhaps that comes from just 'dealing' with things as my husband is blind, very hard of hearing and I've had to 'deal' with all of those things that are happening to him. People keep telling me that I can handle that because I'm strong..  

But I don't feel strong and now that I'm looking at a definitive date on the calendar everything everything has gotten 'real' and I'm feeling on the verge of panic. And in that feeling I'm feeling the fear of losing my hair. Two weeks ago I can't say that I felt this way at all but now... I don't know. My husband has always been my support but with his deafness getting worse I can't even talk with him about this. Of course he'll say he wouldn't care when my hair falls out because he would make a joke out of it by saying he can't see me anyway.  I feel like I have to be the support for him and me and now this fear of losing my hair seems like its made me vulnerable  and not in control. - and I HATE that feeling. 

Can someone tell me when they began to experience hair loss after their first chemo (Adriamycin and Cytoxan to begin with. I have a wigh from the ACS already (its very nice but looks weird on me since I've never had a full head of hair even in my younger years). I have some head covers but today I coculdn't even think of opening the drawer where I put them. Has anyone else ever had these feelings? How did you hangle it?

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MomMom44 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote MomMom44 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 15 2017 at 2:12pm
Hi Gramma Sue,

I was diagnosed about a month before my 67th b-day.  I'm 3 yrs out from diagnosis & I love, love my hair - thanks to chemo.  Backing up...You will lose your hair 2-3 weeks from your first treatment.  I had great hair & was crushed to be losing it.  I bought a very expensive human hair wig because I had a friend who had used one too & I never realized she was going through chemo until years later.  If, God forbid, I have to go thru chemo again, I would not use a wig.  I would use the plain, cotton head covers I used at the gym (NO ONE would wear a wig at the gym!) & I would get some cute stylist head coverings.  I felt like a fake every time I wore the wig-:).
Here's why I love my hair now.  When it first came back I looked like Yoda with weird sprigs of white hair popping up.  But after some months it grew back to my former light brown color, only the front was super curly.  My hair had always been super straight.  I went to my fabulous hair stylist who put a semi perm color - while my former color was growing back.  She also kept cutting it into a semblance of style.  She continues to highlight it for me - looks various shades of blonde with my own color & it's short.  It only takes me 5 minutes to "do" my hair - it used to take 45 minutes of trying to get it to look the way I wanted.  5 minutes v. 45!  Ha! I feel like I've regained so much time!  Plus, it is much more flattering to my face.  I get tons of compliments!  It makes me look much younger than I am.  Love it.  The photo here is of me while I was in my natural color & super curly front stage.  I couldn't get later pics to fit.  If you want to pm me - I'll send you a pic of what it looks like now.  Trust me, you need not fret about your hair.  XOXO  Paula
DX TNBC 1/14; age 66; Stage 1; Grade 2; 1.2 cm; 0/2 nodes; lumpectomy; BRAC Neg; 4 DD AC; Completed 12 weekly Taxol July 2014; Radiation August 2014
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Postive3negative View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Postive3negative Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Feb 24 2017 at 11:55pm
Hi Gramma Sue,

I think we have a bit in common. I'm also one of those people that gets described as strong and stoic and able to handle everything. Most of the time this is true but when I lost my hair I found it really upsetting. It was as if the cancer somehow became much more real. It also seemed so unfair! I'd had to deal with the awful shock of feeling perfectly fine and having four tumours, and now this!!!

My advice is to be sad. Cry about it. Make room for the sadness. My daughter taught me this valuable skill when she was only little. I was trying to jolly her along, much like your husband jollies you along (and much like the way I usually try to cheer myself up) and she turned to me and said, "Mummy, I know you're trying to help, but I really just need to let the sadness out." So when my hair fell out I had a good cry.

Then I went shopping for a really great hat. I found one in a shop that sells hippie type clothing. It was a kind of patchwork fabric hat with a narrow padded brim. It looked really good on me and immediately made me feel more confident. I never wore head scarves because they were hot and itchy but I lived in that hat.

I also got a wig from a wig library that offered hair dressers to fit and shape the wig. This makes a huge difference to how good a wig looks on your head. I didn't wear the wig very much either but when I did, people that hadn't seen me for a while mistakenly thought my hair had grown back. Good looking wigs don't look like wigs.

My hair is back now and it's much nicer than it ever was before it fell out. It's thicker and has come through with all kinds of great looking highlights. I often get asked where I get it coloured! 

I know you posted this message back in February but I hope I'm not too late to be of some help.

Love and gently hugs

Meg


Find me on Wordpress at https://positive3neg.wordpress.com
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