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Shaving my head tonight ...

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Momof2NJ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Momof2NJ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 17 2011 at 9:10am
My sweet Caryn,

i understand the hair thing sweety.  It's not so much that you have to lose your hair and be bald, it's the constant reminder of what you have gone through that made it fall out in the first place.  My prayers and good vibes are with you always.

I have a quote that I like to share...it's one of my favorites and is kind of my mantra.  It's from Albert Camus:

"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me, lay an invincible summer"

love you girl,
mary ellen
2008 BRCA 1+ dx stg 1,gr 3 IDC triple neg. BM w/ recon. CT x 4. Prophy TAH 2007. Recurrence 9/13/10. 10/5/10 tumor excised. ACx4, Taxol x3, abraxane x 9. 38 rads. 7/11 NED!!!
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zacar View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote zacar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 17 2011 at 1:51pm
You are lovely for sending that quote Mary Ellen.  Thank you.  And yes, it's just another thing cancer has taken away from me but there are more important things to deal with like this horrible stomach ache I've had for 6 weeks now.  

This morning at 6:30 I dragged myself to the kitchen to get some morphine.  My doctor prescribes it for me and it's in vials they mixed with saline so it goes through my port.  What a relief it was but it's very short acting so I've been taking a lot of it lately.  I just had an ultrasound and they didn't see any masses.  I have no idea what it is but the doc asked me if I could please hold on for 2 more infusions and then we can get scans and I can zap the brain met.  I don't know if this has anything to do with the blood clot in my stomach that I've been taking daily shots of generic Lovenox for.  But today was different - the pain woke me.  The IBC looks less red and angry so hopefully the Abraxane is working.  So now everyone's been updated ... ugh!  I hate cancer!

Love,
Caryn  
DX 11/07 age 49, Stg 1, Gr 3, 1.1 cm, lump, 0/1 nodes, BRCA-,TC x 4, 37 rads, 2/08, 1/09,recur to axilla nodes 5/10 recur in mediastinal node,stage iv, 09/10 carbo/gem/parp, 2/11 NED, 3/11 stg iv IBC
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janet c. View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote janet c. Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 17 2011 at 6:15pm
Caryn,
I am so sorry that you are in so much pain. Maybe they could give you a different medicine that could last longer. Hopefully the Abraxane it working. Keeping you in my prayers and hope that you have a good sleep.
Janet
dx 12/08 @47yrs.old TNBC stage 2a grade 3, 2.1cm. partial mastectomy sentinal node negative BRACA negative Cytocan/Taxatere x4 radiation 36 or 38rounds
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Debris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 24 2011 at 11:42am
Hi Caryn,

Just checking in to see how you are doing these days? Hope things are still improving, and that you continue to regain some strength.

Take Care.

Deborah.
4/12 Xeloda/Tykerb
2 Carboplatin
12/11 Dx IA
9 Gemzar/Taxotere Dx IBC:FEC
5 Ixempra/Sprycel
2 25 Rad
10/10 BRCA1-/2suv
9 NED
6 Stg4 Grd3 many nodes no Sx/Rad. Taxol/Avastin
06/08 Dx DCIS 0/SN Rads/AIs
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote HappyGoLucky Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 24 2011 at 12:03pm
Dear Caryn
Praying that you are not in so much pain..(((cyber hugs for you)))  Praying that you have a restored strength of health and spirit. Bless you.
Love,
Karen
2/2009 7cm tumor, sent nod. pos. Lumpectomy 3/19/09,a/c dose dense+avastin clinical trial, taxol avastin stopped with pneumonia. 33 Rads 01/2010 ~ reccur 2011 supraclav.and internal mammary nodes. rad
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zacar View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote zacar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 24 2011 at 3:52pm
Thank you for checking on me.  Now I have another infection in the catheter portion of my port.  Unfortunately, the drug infusion company screwed up and send only 1 mg instead of 2 so not much happened to help it over the weekend.  I'm now doing 2 of the 1 mg until they delivery the correct one.  Other than that the stomach thing comes and goes.  Wed is the last infusion before the scans.  I don't think the IBC is gone as it is still red, etc. and we'll have to see if there is now more than one brain met.  

I growing very weary of all this.  I never seem to feel quite good enough to go out with my friends ....missed one of my best friend's daughters' Bat Mitzvah so overcompensated with more money than I would normally give.  Friends call and want to do t lunch or dinner and i never know how i feel.  I've become somewhat of a recluse.  Ok enough bitching.  You all know what I'm talking about.

Again, thanks for checking on me.  I'm sorry I haven't kept up with many of you and need to be active on the board again.  

Love to you all.

Caryn
DX 11/07 age 49, Stg 1, Gr 3, 1.1 cm, lump, 0/1 nodes, BRCA-,TC x 4, 37 rads, 2/08, 1/09,recur to axilla nodes 5/10 recur in mediastinal node,stage iv, 09/10 carbo/gem/parp, 2/11 NED, 3/11 stg iv IBC
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trip2 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote trip2 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 2:24pm
Love to you too Caryn, sure hope the infection goes away soon..
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